The SM Dykes Conference 2013

My mate Jupiter bullied me into going essentially. Up to about a year and a half ago I was quite involved in the BDSM public scene. I had folks I played with at events and my two girlies, Jupiter and Freyja, whom I still play with privately. Then I moved cities and fell into a relationship with my current partner. Suddenly, what with Jiu Jitsu and general life things, I had a lot less time and inclination to be out on the scene. I went to a few munches in the new place but didn’t really click with the different groups, and I drifted away. Jupiter insisted that the SM Dykes Conference would be amazing, as it was for her the last couple of years, and she needed the moral support to cope with facing an ex, so I went.

And actually, it was pretty good.

I went to five different workshops over the two days with topics on ways of using words for effect, different play styles, and flogging with emotion. There was an excellent speed-meeting event that led to lots of great conversations. Ooo, and there were two hands-on sessions, a rope workshop and a latex hoods drop-in, that I really enjoyed. Sessions I didn’t get to go to that I wish I had included a boot/shoe fetish one, a discussion on feminism and kink and a discussion about penises and cocks from a trans* and dom(me) point of view.

The event was open to women and people with links to the female community, so there were genderqueer people, transmen, transwomen, people in transition, people who want to transition but cannot yet for whatever reason and those who are only out in certain situations. It was a crash-course for me in pronoun usage, and it was an eye-opener for me for the kinds of difficulties trans* people face. The best thing though was seeing and hearing the joy and confidence they gained from being in a safe space, where they can be exactly who they are, without fear. Continue reading